Theory Of The Chase…
November 12, 2009 by: KiLLaYou know that thing you always want, but dont have.. And then try to do ajeeb things in trying to attain it.. Same thing applies when trying to reel a chick.. You all dressed up in your Eid clothes.. You go to Sandton City.. You see this girl.. She virtually knocks your socks out with her beauty.. You see who she’s with.. You know one of em… Now what..
Now you call that someone that you know and ask for the girls number.. After endless ping pong sessions the accomplice finally caves in and gives it.. You then message her.. The “who r u and where did u get my number” session begins.. And then for weeks and even months you try to get this girl.. And in honesty it gives many a guy that adrenaline rush.. That will to make your blood pump faster.. That extra drive..
Night after night, this oke will call and message the goose..he will invite her on mxit, gTalk, facebook etc etc.. The girl fends off all initial requests.. “Wanna do coffee” No she says.. “wanna go for a movie”.. No she says… And this cycle continues.. Then suddenly one day.. When the stars in the universe went out of alignment for a bit, she says “ye, wat the heck.. Ill come with you”.. And you go..
The oke gets ready, he chooses the perfect venue.. he takes her there.. They both enjoy each others company.. The next day.. he trys something more ajeeb.. He says to her he had fun and wishes to do it again some time.. And this time it seemed that the stars just lost all the liquid within their ears and she says, “Yes, why not”.. And this going out cycle continues.. Until One Day..
That one day, he takes her to a bit of a more upmarket place as he did before.. he is dressed a tad bit more fancy than normal.. He then does the impossible and asks the girl to be his girlfriend in some official manner.. Like an effen proposal with no ring.. And by some god forsaken miracle, she is chuffed and her toes tingle and she says “OMG, I thought you’d neva ask.. Of cos i would”.. And then its official.. The okes nuts get bolted.. But what now..
Is it just me, or does all excitement and thrill go away from something once it becomes “official”.. There is no more drive, no more excitement, no more not having that which you couldnt have.. As you now have it.. Now what.. Do you still send that SMS every other hour.. Do you still flirt as much as you used to.. Do you still chat and talk on the phone as much as u used to.. Do you end up fighting and arguing more ??
Is it because you start taking things way too seriously..I dunno.. What do you guys think ? Does the fire in a relationship end once the chase is over ??
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It’s not that there’s no more excitement, it’s just that process of the so-called ‘chase’ is all rubbish to begin with.
All fairy tales come to an end and if there’s nothing real to back it up when one does get married, then the couple is in big trouble.
I know many couples that break off (engagements even) once the ‘chase’ is over.
Howver, for some of us, the fire does not end once the ‘chase is over’.
It’s replaced by something better
This post should be entitled “Signs of a Playa” or “Proof that men are Dogs”
No doubt the chase can be fun but if that’s all it is then what’s the point? I agree with Fatima that there needs to be something real behind it or eventually it’s bound to get tiresome.
sms’s every hour? dude, keep up with tech advancements… Mxit msg’s and twitter DM’s have come close to doing away with sms’s all together.
if that’s the dating norm, i’d be a classic fail, i am terrible at keeping in touch, and i reply texts 3 days late. Btw, do they still make bumper stickers?
Affection has many faces, excitement is new affection, worry and butterflies are anxious affection, playing hard to get is affection on defrost, passion is affection on fire, fondness is affection fuelled by coals, If things remained too intense we would burn out, or burn each other, or crowd each other. Every relationship finds its own balance. We also set benchmarks for ourselves, so its easy to create a high impact prelude… sustainability is always a question. Different personality types seek different things, i like my space,,,, but i like my life with my special someone as well. Eventually when you get passed the chase, u want someone who’s easy to live with so you both will have peace
The status quo shifts and shifts again to accommodate work, issues, stresses, family…
Are you a professional journalist? You write very well.
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Only sick people would get bored and be not interested after the so called ‘chase” is over
HAHAHAHA Man this is too funny. I cant comment i never chased so much just not worth the effort.
Killa is right and wrong… as a teen I enjoyed the thrill of the chase, after the guy fell for me, excitement/challenge was gone… until I met the infamous 1(for me anyway), after hours on mIrc and Mxit… we married and 4 years later… ya we fight, dont do cell contact anymore, but it changes/evolves, its not superficial clothes and fancy words but for meaningful and there still is excitement
Killa you monkei you just like what you can’t have
and if you carry on with that idea you will never be happy!!true story!
The chase….sounds more like lust has died out and there is no love to replace it. If there is always a new chase, its similar to a dog trying to catch its own tail…ones it catches it, it does’nt know what do u do with it!
I really like your blog and i respect your work. I’ll be a frequent visitor.
killa, i think it depends on the couple! I agree with QT…every relationship finds a sustainable way 2 move 4ward!
Enjoyed the post
Soemtimes the chase never ends when the person is unpredictable and most of the times girls are moody and that keeps a relationship going.