KiLLa.Co.Za

AERWAH, Vut a thing. Myself, Salaam Bah and Moosa Pheer were at the Bullrun (masia mara) at the Plaza, and since Moosa who is always travelling got back from Dubai, he say he seen an abaya for 40000 Deerhams. Vut is it wit dees Abaya ??

Ven i vus in Soccer Ceety during opening ceremony…I had my Makarapa and media vanted to take puicture of my Makarapa and saying that they have never seen such a thing… A mining helmet that has been Pimped..Then in the distance I seen this helmet shining,Like Swarovskie crystals etc..What a Makarapa.. Den I see dis Big glasses on the Makarapa, I take a closer look.Areh Wah.It was a lady wid Abaya..Pimped Up..Swarovskies and silk and Big Prada sunglasses not on over her eyes but on her head (like the pic shown above)..

I see she getting attention from cameras and media..Bafana T shirt and this PIMPED up Abaya.. But at the same time this unty vus marketing other Fashion brands like Loreal,because there was a fringe sticking out and Estee Louder because the Lipstick was as red as Itumuleng Khune’s kit on the day..This Abaya was giving more attention to the media then the opening game itself.. Even more than Tshabalala’s diski dance..

So is this teh next biggest fashion accessory after Louie Vittone.. The other day me and teh boys were in Marine Parade walking..Three Bikini Surfers were coming our way and a unty in PIMPED up abaya.. Everybody looking at Abya unty and not semi naangee surfers.. Again unty vas wearing Skinny jeans…Abaya with swarovskis and Big Gucci Glasses on head and brands like Loreal,Estee Louder were getting exposure..Vut a thing i tell you vut a thing..

google pics

Such is phenomina now that BMW are placing a pair of PRADA SUNGLASSES and AN ABAYA in the cubby hole of all X FIVES.. What is a x5 WITHOUT an Abaya driving Unty.. Its like PAMPLONA FESTIVAL with no bulls..

Vile at  the PLAZA Salaam Bha reckon dat he got Import Idea..He say he buy Abayas, but these Abayas come with a pair of glasses stuck on the Abaya..You just put the Abaya on and the glasses sits on top of your head glued on the Abaya.. You cna buy different variations like Gucci,Armani,Police and now even Oakley.. So what is it with this Abaya.. Is it now like Louie Vittone that you have to looked the smartest? The only way you going to do this is by
PIMPING IT..

The other day did one Unty she was looking beautiful with PIMPED UP ABAYA and skinny jeans and Gladiator sandles.. Red Estee Luder lipstick I say hello…She look at me and say I dont Speak to Strange men.. I say to myself Areh Wah…If you had normal Abaya I vuld be scared..But you so PIMPED UP, dat I thought you inviting confrontation..Logic has it dat wen you drive 14oo DATSUN bakkie people just say dat car is strong.. But ven you PIMP dat DATSUN wid mags and sound and color,  of cos people are going to approcah you and say nice car..Same concept dont u agree..

google pics

So who is dees Swarovski bhai.. He vus a Bohemian glass cutter that now make ladies jags ven they making Abaya’s.. Everytime you say word “swarovski’ dee veemen dey go “oh ma gawd, i love swarovksi, oh ma gawd”.. Den on Eid Day, ven you attend the  Boswel Wilkie Breextin Eedgah, you veel see all these Swarovski’s been shown off in their gleetz and glamour.. Even if it is just 1 and not everyone.. Dees veemen, they veel spend 2000 rand meeneemin for entry level Abaya.. But let the husband say he vunt one Daffah kurtah for R300 he get shouting “Essop you idiot, how can you buy a R300 kurtah that you will only wear on one day the whole year. Its insane. Come lets go buy me shoes”..

Dey veel spend dees 2-4 ajjar (thousand) rand on Abaya that will wear for half a day, until the zoo lake session starts.. Den dee lates from the Milan catwalks veel be unveiled.. Rumour has it, dat dees year Zenith from Pietersburg hired the batmobile for the Zoo Lake parade to go with her catwomen Abaya, pimped with leather and black swarovski’s..But these are no ordinary swarovskis.. This is CHINA MART brand.. Same texture, design and bling for a quarter of dee price..

Next thing you know, Uncle Salaam will open a trade partner with Nike’s China office.. Make sweat shops for Abaya production.. Chorowski’s.. New label.. Made in China..

Vut do the husbands and fathers have to say… Are they playing bailoh tactics and just splashing the VISA.. Or are they getting china mart ROKRAA ONLY stock..

UBG leaves us with these final parting words “HATE THE GAME, NOT THE PLAYA”

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Its that time of the year again.. Where the MASAI MARA of insaan takes place.. The yearly migration of floods of insaan from Sandton City to the Plaza and back.. Its an amazing site..

Here is what Uncle Bhai Gora (UBG) had to say on the matter..

Link –> Theory Of Eid Shopping..

Click the above link for the post.

property of KiLLa.co.za

click on pic to enlarge

I was in a suburb (as explained in this post) the other day.. And i just, by chance happened to see my long lost friend, Uncle Salaam spinning in a brand new 335i.. Wat a beast  that car is.. I managed to get his attention by waving  a R10 note and he came to me.. “UBG bah, long time bah.. Where u lost bah..” UBG enquired about the new car.. “This car bah, i bought now before ramzaan bah.. So i pay less jakaat bah.. Last year i bought property in Umhlanga bah”.. Wats the latest.. So after spending a staggering 112 minutes with Uncle Salaam, UBG came up with the ff:

• Uncle Salaam uses one Lipton tea-bag over 2 days
• Uncle Salaam’s favourite juice is Kan-Joos
• Uncle Salaam’s wife asked him to go get containers to store left over food, he called Transet
• Uncle Salaam takes alternate routes to Deben to avoid toll fee’s
• Uncle Salaam won a trip for 2 to mauritius, he went twice
• Uncle Salaam has a section in his wallet for coupons
• Uncle Salaam has a parking meter outside his shop.
• Uncle Salaam invented Park n Ride.. U park by his shop, u go in.. And he take you for a ride
• Uncle Salaam goes to donate blood and asks for a tax receipt
• Uncle Salaam reads the Bible and Quraan cos it has stories on Prophets..
• Uncle Salaam needed a new safe for his oopling rokrah, so he went to THE MATTRESS FACTORY
• Uncle Salaam knows the tax laws better than SARS
• Praveen Gordon calls Uncle Salaam for tax evasion scam methodolgy’s and preventions
• His daughter call’s Uncle Salaam ‘deddy’ (http://hamishpillay.wordpress.com)
• Uncle Salaam asked his wife, Aunty Barbie for her VAT number after paying mihr (http://hamishpillay.wordpress.com)
• Uncle Salaam’s first piece of furniture in his new house was a money counter and UV light to check for fake notes (http://hamishpillay.wordpress.com)
• Fifa bought World Cup tickets from Uncle Salaam at a premium
• Diff between Uncle Salaam and a boat is that a boat tips sometimes

Thats all for now.. Feel free to add your own